Everyone here at LUC knows of what I speak. That insufferable destructive force that is immortal as it is prevalent. That unutterable danger that lurks in the deepest, most remote recesses of everyone’s heart:
Fatties.
As of 2006, fat chicks have destroyed more erections than Meatspin, Goatse, and Tubgirl combined (Stephen Hawking; Scientific Journal.) More devastating to food stores than a plague of locusts, these monstrous abominations consume and slowly digest everything edible (and some things inedible) in their over-sized paths. The subject of many a joke and disgusting conversation during meals in the Simpson cafeteria, fat chicks not only erase any chance of getting a boner that night, they also eat every last ice cream topping or decent food morsel in the entire fucking lunchroom.
I wouldn’t have a problem with fat girls if they didn’t have their inane, “whoa-is-me” state of mind. Self-pity about weight and indiscriminate ingestion are indeed mutually exclusive. You can’t say “I wish I wasn’t so fat,” and then eat three helpings of ice cream, two “healthy chicken wraps,” and salad with pork fat dressing.
Maybe I’m ignorant in my position, due to the paragon of physical excellence that is my hot teen bod. However, I refuse to empathize with fat girls (fat guys are fat because guys eat copiously in their utter apathy, which is different than fat girls) because they have the ability to change themselves, but their irrevocable lethargy conquers their willpower (which is low in the first place.)
So, next time you are a fat chick, eat some cyanide, or embrace it and enjoy the incomparable joy that is food (except Simpson food.)
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hahahahaha ohhh fatties
Dude, you didn’t cite your sources correctly.
Obviously the credibility of this paper is seriously in question.
PS: Fat girls are gross lolz
LOLZ
Fantastic, simply fantastic
look at my chin