My Usual Lamentations

In light of recent events, of whom the participants will remain nameless, I have come to a very significant conclusion about myself, especially in relation to other people. “What is this revelation?” you ask. It’s something along these lines: I am drastically, exponentially, and severely...

And Then

A clear symptom of mental degradation: being up at 4:00 AM, writing facebook notes and listening to Air Supply. Sweet. For most of this year, the three girls that live across the courtyard from my room have kept their shades up for most of the time; and for some of this time they even walk around in...

The Blight Of Loyola

Everyone here at LUC knows of what I speak. That insufferable destructive force that is immortal as it is prevalent. That unutterable danger that lurks in the deepest, most remote recesses of everyone’s heart: Fatties. As of 2006, fat chicks have destroyed more erections than Meatspin, Goatse, and...

Ebay and the dumbest person in the world

‘You may think you know who the dumbest person in the world is. One nominee is T-pain, who feels it necessary to tell us his name in the famed song Buy You a Drink. Other votes might be cast for Ian, Steve Jobs (and all apple users), and R. Kelly for Trapped in the Closet. I agree all of the above...